FRIDAY DECEMBER 13
“His
father…had never disciplined him at any time.” 1Ki 1:6 NLT
DICTATOR,
DOORMAT OR DIPLOMAT? (2)
The
Permissive style. This parent has few rigid rules, and
explains to the child their rules, standards and decisions. The child’s
opinions and ideas are hear and included in decision-making. Reason is used rather
than force. These parents talk and discuss perspectives rather than using
threats. Unfortunately, few household responsibilities are demanded of the
child, denying them the opportunity to contribute and learn to function
cooperatively. The parent is a “facilitator” and “resource person.” In such
homes children “self-regulate” in areas such as bedtime, dating the car,
friends, dress, the internet, music, and curfew. What are the pulses of this
parenting style? Kids usually adore permissive parents, feel close and safe
with them. These parents never belittle their kids, their ideas and
perspectives, nor shame or embarrass, or make them feel like failures. Rather,
they encourage their thinking, innovation, initiative, social and communication
skills. They model forgiveness, patience and flexibility. But let’s look at the
minuses of this style. Parental guidance is missing, and low demand for household
responsibilities leaves kids unprepared for life in the real world. They lack
the structure and boundaries needed for relationships and the workplace, and
have difficulty accepting the word, “No!” The absence of a parental role model
for leadership and decision-making leads to motivational deficit, requiring
someone to “jump-start” them to get them going. This style provides many
healthy, positive characteristics, producing kids who may be happy, but suffer
losses productively and relationally.
Taken
from the Word for You Today Devotional
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